Everthing She Was
by 1rosebyanyothername
Summary: She was everything I wanted to be, and everything I hated about myself...Lily's P.O.V. with a little bit of Petunias at the end. Not my usual scope of characters but i liked it. Sorry bad summary..just read it, its short. Thanks luvs.


**Disclaimer: IT'S NOT MINE!!**

**Hello luvs. Short little flight of fancy for you**

**Enjoy.**

_Everything She Was_

She was my greatest enemy, and my best friend.

She terrified me, but I felt like I always needed to protect her from reality.

She was the bane of my existence, and the reason for my strength.

I told of her antics to all of my friends, I made her into the villain of all of my stories, but I defended her fiercely if anyone else said a word against her.

I hated her so much that I tried to push her away, but I loved her enough that it hurt when I did.

She made me cry more than anyone or anything else ever did, but when she made me laugh I forgave her for everything.

We lied to each other, but we were each other's most trusted confidants.

She was the reason for my insecurity, but she was always so unsure.

I scorned the way she lived her life, but I wanted so desperately to be accepted by her.

She knew I was always the pretty one, but she always made me feel ugly and awkward.

She was my hero, my friend, my mentor, and my ally. She was the lowest person I had ever met, she was my sworn enemy, she was irresponsible, and she was my biggest problem. She was everything I wanted to be, and everything I hated about myself all rolled up into one small, blonde, makeup wearing teenaged girl.

At barely five feet tall (and an imaginary one inch) she was a force of nature; though a destructive one.

When we were younger, we were both unable to control our extraordinarily violent tempers.

We fought, we screamed, we broke things, we were the cause of many neighborhood disturbances.

Things always seemed to get so much more out of hand because everything I did was oddly emphasized by something breaking in another room or the person I was angry with suddenly appearing in a tree a few yards away. It was unexplainable, but she always got even angrier when things like that happened. Looking back I think it was because I frightened her.

Eventually, I began to be able to control my strange abilities, though admittedly I only ever used them to annoy her. And then, one day, he came into my life.

The neighbors boy, Severus, he came one day when we were playing outside and told me that my strange abilities weren't some unknown birth defect, but magic.

I was only too ready to believe him, even more so when I realized how crazy it made her.

I started spending less and less time with her, and more time with him, right up until the time when my letter came.

Every summer, I came home wanting so badly for her to be excited for me, but she remained distant, becoming more and more resentful and bitter as I stopped trying to bridge the gap between us and spent my summers with Sev instead, exploring the neighborhood and planning the upcoming year.

One summer I came home and she was engaged to be married to that awful Dursley boy. He was absolutely horrid, and yet she had the nerve to insult my James, who had come to visit me for a few days while they were busy planning the wedding.

Our final split came as I was leaving for my final year at school; she refused to even come to the station to see me off, and I had spent most of the night pleading with her, finally screaming that she was jealous of my magic, and always had been, and stomping out the door.

I never spoke to my sister again; it was only through my mother that she learned of my marriage to James and our son, Harry.

I always felt that a part of me was missing. She had been my best friend, my biggest annoyance, and the motivation for everything that I had ever done. I missed her terribly, though I would never tell her so.

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_My baby sister is dead, she died and I was left her only son. I can't believe the last time I spoke to her was when she was seventeen and leaving for her last year of school. I felt like a piece of me was missing when she went away without saying goodbye, and I knew that we wouldn't talk again._

_She was so beautiful, I always felt so awkward and ugly around her. _

_She was my biggest rival, and my best friend._

_Her powers terrified me, but I felt like I always needed to protect her from reality._

_She was the bane of my existence, and the reason for my strength._

_I told of her strange antics to all of my friends, I made her into the villain of all of my stories, but I defended her fiercely if anyone else said a word against her._

_I hated her so much that I tried to push her away, but I loved her enough that it hurt when I did._

_She made me cry more than anyone or anything else ever did, but when she made me laugh I forgave her for everything._

_We lied to each other, but we were each other's most trusted confidants._

_She was the reason for my insecurity, but she was always so unsure._

_She was my better half, though I would have died rather than admit it._

_I scorned the way she lived her life, but I wanted so desperately to be accepted by her and her kind._

_I wanted her magic, but I was so afraid of it._

_She was my inspiration, my charge, and my partner in crime. She was everything I loved about myself and everything I wanted to be all rolled up into a little redheaded bundle of light._

_I missed her terribly when she left, though I was always much too proud to tell her so._

_I can't believe she's gone…_

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**So that was just a short little fic that I've been sitting on for a while, it actually did not originate as a fic but rather as something that came into my mind after a particularly ugly spat with my older sister. (Yes as strange as it may sound I do think in stories sometimes). **

**We have a very strained relationship with a lot of stuff that's happened between us and I would appreciate it if you could keep the burns to a minimum, because as strange as it may seem it was actually hard for me to write this.**

**Sorry luvs I know I'm rambling and you all are really not interested in my family life.**

**For those waiting on my other stories…I'm trying as hard as I can to update quickly, bear with me.**

**Tell me what you thought?**

**Love as always,**

**1rosebyanyothername**


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